It was back in those days when I use to travel from Agra to Delhi almost every other week, sometimes even every week to take up one or the other. I was in under graduation in Dayalbagh Educational institute, aspiring to do get admission in a good MBA college. Most of the exams would have Delhi as examination centre, and that was most convenient for me. It was 2002 winters; My schedule was to take a train on Saturday night after the college and reach Delhi by 9 PM or 9:30PM; I used to stay there with my local guardian’s extended family in rajendra nagar, so spend the night there, and early morning with my backpack move to the examination centre and appear for the exam and then back to the New Delhi railway to catch a train back to Agra.
That was a usual trip and I was at Agra Cant railway station on a cold foggy evening, waiting for a train ride to Delhi. I had a general class ticket. The trains were running late due to fog. There was more than regular crowd on station as previous trains were late and it was a weekend. Every body was waiting for the first train for ride as they all wanted to reach Delhi earliest like me.
Operator announces that the train is coming on platform no. 2. We all were on platform 1 so we all rush to the other side. Every body wanted to get early on train and set a good seat. We just reached the other side and the operator makes an announcement that its gona come on platform 1. People rush from platform 2 to platform1. for some reason I got irritated and stayed on 2, thinking that I will not take this one but the next one which will arrive 15-20 mins after this first one. Then we hear the announcement for the third time that its gona come on platform 2. People start their rush again for my side. And we can see the train coming from far. So people start crossing the railway track instead of the over bridge to get this side quickly. There was this old man who also got down to cross the tracks. He crosses and then he come this side and he tries to get up on the curb. But he is too old to lift himself. He is really trying and no body is looking at him as they are all busy with their concerns. This old man is really panic and looking at the train and still trying to get up, for some reason not shouting. I suddenly saw this man and extended my hand “upar ayiyee”…. He looked at me grabbed my hand and I pulled him with all my strength. We both fell on the platform and when we got up we realized two things; train has arrived and slowing down and he lost one of his shoes on tracks. One of the beggars gets his shoes and gave him back in exchange of 10 rupees. He comes to say thanks to me with minor scratches on his chin. I smiled, ‘its ok’.
“Where are you going?” He asked
Delhi, I replied. I have a exam tomorrow.
Do you have a ticket? He asked
Yes, but it’s too crowded; I will take the next train. I replied.
Come with me, he said. I have tickets in 2nd AC.
Ohh no I will be fine, do not worry. I said. I really did not want to spend that much money.
Do not worry I will talk to TT, come with me.
It was 7 PM and it takes 3.5 hours to reach Delhi, I made up my mind to pay if needed and I walked with him. We took our seat and TT came. He never asked for my ticket, and then this old man tells me that he is an independence fighter and he is allowed to take one person as care taker with him where ever he goes. And he does not pay as he has one of those Independence fighter identity cards.
Then we stated talking about my exams my family and things about me. And then he stated telling me about himself. He was a scientist in NPL (National physics laboratory). And his wife was a chemist in NCL (national Chemical laboratory). The he tells me this entire story about his work life, how he met his wife and how they got marries and their Germany trip and their visit to Europe and many more things, I do not remember all now. Then he talks about his son who is in Bangalore and is also appearing for MBA exams this year. And he compares his son to me in studies and courage and many other stuff which parents see in their kids.
Suddenly I asked “Aap Delhi kisis kaam se ja rahe hai?” (Are you going to Delhi for work?).
He took a long deep breath “No I stay in Delhi”. I chuckled, wow; your wife stays at Bangalore and you at Delhi. “I stay at Independence fighter shelter” he said. That was the moment I felt I should not laugh. Then he explains me that he and his son does not go along well and thus his wife choose the option to stay with son and he had to leave house and stay here in independence fighter shelter. He further tells me how like 40 years ago just randomly he applied for permission to stay at independence fighter shelter, with no intension to ever stay there ever, and it came right in time when he needed it most.
He told me few incidences of his and his son’s not getting along and then he will keep mum for some time. Probably he was crying within and then again he will say something and then be quite for some time. He talked about his wife trying to keep them both together. And then he tells story about the day he moved out of the house, in detail. He still used to pay EMI for the house his wife and son stayed at Bangalore. I kept quite and listened and observed him for 3 hours until we reached Delhi.
Thanks Uncle, I will take my Bus to rajendra nagar now. I said.
Oh you are going to rajendra nagar; there is a direct cab from my place to rajendra nagar only for ladies. He said. It was not a bad offer as I was scared to travel alone at 10:30 night in Delhi.
Independence fighter shelter in near to “Gol Daak Khana” in New Delhi area near to some hospital. It was like 5 mins bus ride from New Delhi railway station. Again for bus I did not pay, the ticket collector just looked at his card and he told that I am with him. So we get down at “Gol Daak Khana” and then we crossed the road to reach independence fighter shelter home. He took his keys from the counter and he showed me his room. It was a pretty simple room with one bed one study table and chair and one rocking chair, with some cups probably for tea and a plate and a bowl for food. On other side on a shelf there was some picture frames, of his wife and son. On same shelf below the one which had pictures, there were many books. He picks up one of them and he tells me, “look at this book, I wrote it.” ‘Really, wow! You write books too.” No… just one. He said. Then we informed the receptionist to let us know if the cab arrives.
We come back to his room; he offers me tea, which I generously accept. I do not take tea, but that day I did not said no even once. We talked more about his book writing experience and his work like and his wife. The receptionist comes in to inform me that cab is there. I took my backpack and came out of his house. He offered me to walk me to the cab. So we walked, he says “come see me if you ever come this side and feel like meting me”. I promised “Sure I will”. I get into the cab, his eyes were wet…I waived my hand, the cab started, I saw him standing there and looking at me, until the cab took a turn on other road.

That was back in 2002 Dec. I stayed in Delhi from 2003 may to 2005 Feb, and never got a chance to go back and meet him. Then I got campus placement at Pune and I went there. Then I got married and came here to California. I kind of remembered him on and off and thought of going back and meeting him, but probably because of my negligence I never went to meet him. Last night I was in one of orange county public library, looking for Hindi books for my students. There was this Chinese girl carrying so many books in her hands, tumbles and all her books are on floor. I bent down to help her, I pick up only one book and it says “Statistical Methods” by Maheshewar Nichani.
That was his name. Like a cold current everything passed through my brain. I do not know where is he and how is he or if I can meet him ever again in my life. But today I am regretting most for not taking out time to go and see him even once.

The Law of Cause and Effect

The idea of writing this came to me when I was flipping through pages of random books and by change stuck at the Aristotelian Principle of Causality, or what we today call the Law of Cause and Effect.

When people believed anything which they can not understand is GOD, to amuse them and put a period on further thinking, Aristotle stated something completely different. It changed our view of the world forever. 

Everything happens for a reason; for every effect there is a specific cause. 

Aristotle postulated that we live in a world which is governed by Laws and not by mere chance.  Everything happens for reason weather we understand it or not.  Many times we come to know the reason long after the effect. He said that every effect has a specific cause or causes. Every cause or action has an effect of some kind or another, whether we can see it, or whether we like it or not. 

This law is equally applicable on achievement, wealth, happiness, and prosperity and business success. Everything happens for a reason, good or bad, positive or negative.

This is referred to in the Bible as the Law of Sowing and Reaping which says that, "Whatsoever a man soweth, that also shall he reap." 

Sir Isaac Newton called it the third Law of motion. He said, "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." 

For us it can be like “As we think, so are we”. Thoughts are the cause and the primary creative forces in humans. We create the entire world by thinking and then slowly we are in that.

 

Understanding What I Want to Achieve

When I meet people who are above 50 or 55 years of their age, I always ask them, “Do you feel, you are successful” . To my surprise most of them come with Answer “no”. Obviously my next question is “Why?” I always add stuff to my question like if they have money or good family or good children or some spirituality, these are just to give them a direction to think and most of the time it’s a success. They do start thinking on these things and these things further lead them to special things in their life which make them or don’t make then successful in their views. So they do come up with their reasons, and most of the time its like they were not able to understand what they want from them and some even if they understood , they were not able to figure out how to achieve that. There were also people who are still not clear what would have made them successful.
Understanding what I want to achieve, and particularly how I will achieve it, is much harder than it seems. Personally, it's less difficult to identify what I want to achieve, the hardest part is deciding how I will get there and then summoning the commitment to make it all the way. Which is the reason this next question is perhaps the most important in defining your success and success plan. WHY do I want to achieve these things? If sometimes I don’t feel strongly enough about achieving something, there is very little chance I will have the stamina to stick with it. Personally speaking in this scenario; almost every time I have not achieved it. If I know exactly WHY it is I want something, if I find a way to remind yourself everyday so that I can stay committed I tend to do it or sometimes if I am leaving it I know very strongly perhaps I am successful in leaving it right here. If I find yourself quitting halfway, it is most likely that I didn't spend enough time understanding WHY part of I wanted that something. Best way is to Go back and truly think about it, I might just find that I was doomed from the start because my WHY wasn't strong enough

A philosophy of life: - I am an adventurer, looking for treasures.

According to so many people, I do not enjoy my life, I make so much so I should go out and spend money in many things which they think they like and they hope I too will like and then they assume that I will be enjoying my life.

Most of the time I pass off these moments with a make over smile on my lips, really stretching my cheeks, but very rare I when I keep hearing this stuff from so many people around me, perhaps I ask questions to myself, are they right.
Something very similar happened very recent and I am in such an age where sometimes I need to verify, things I know are right or wrong. I heard this for long and decided that ok let me do some research, real good work and what ever is the outcome I will follow that at least for next 10 years. I am expecting that perception along with economy and concepts will change in 10 years. I believe that’s quite realistic. First thing was to find out what I want to achieve. I kept it very simple “I want to be happy”.
So the question was to identify the general activities or the conditions or mental situations when you feel happy and satisfied. This went very subjective, as different people can be happy in “N” number of different situations and mental states.
So I reduced the question to “If you have more money than you require for living, then will spending your extra money on things which are not the “Need” or “Want” but you “Like” will make you happy?”
So I started with methodology for research. First go was on books, quotes, philosophies, lectures and all written knowledge. All gave me a negative result.

Then I was talking to one of my good friends and he said “May be you are playing favorites, you are picking up books which you like”. Hum that can be a valid reason for skewness of my output.
Probably I should go out and talk to people. Which people, well I guess since I want to be happy ultimately, every body in my sample space should be happy.
This was again a very subjective question, that how will you know that they are happy.
Based upon a research, I prepared some questions and I interviewed people. They never knew that they are being interviewed for a purpose. People who were very frequent in giving me this advice were the ones around me and easy to approach, so they were the beginners of my sample space.
To my surprise, none of they admitted that they are happy. I was very rude to say that how come you are not happy when you do all the stuff you tell me to do in order to be happy.
I was really confused at this point of time but I was more boosted up, the idea that this will save 10 years of confusion in my life on this point was enough to keep me working.
So I started going to people in my office. I started with my collogues. 50% of them were out as they were not happy. That makes my sample very small low. I needed more people. So I added up one more criteria, let me look for successful people and then let me try and find out if they are happy and then I can test they for my main research question.
I approached senior leadership in company. My boss agreed to help me, being one of the senior leaders she was a great resource to get people. I managed to meet people from my Company, Disneyland, and few of my company’s clients and spouse of senior leaders in my company. They all helped me to take interviews where I was not able to go and meet in person. The set of question was same and they were more effective in digging out response than me.
We all pooled up our data which included senior leaders from different organizations, my collogues and my off the work circle and friends. This sample was a mix of people from different culture and country.
We found out that 80-85% of people who are happy and in some way successful in life and have positive attitude towards life and also make more money than they need, actually do not like to spend their money on things which is not their “ Need” “ Want” but they just like that thing, or that activity. There are few things which fall in their “Hobby” and they really find pleasure in doing so and so they do spend when they have extra.
The other observation was that all these people believed in multiplying the money rather than spending it. It’s clear that the amount of money they have right now is enough for their life still they all are interested in multiplying and spending them wisely. None of them spend money to compete with others or just because the other person who is really close to them is doing it. None of these people said that their “desire” exceeds their financial sense.
All these people have different ways to be happy and none of these have “Spending money” as one of the way to be happy. One of the finance guy is happy making money in stocks and investment, the other is really happy if he goes for a bike ride every night, one of very senior leadership women becomes happy to cook for her family and kids everyday. Somebody goes back home on Friday and look at her numbers to be happy rather than going out and partying.
Inference: Possible there is a philosophy of life that :- I am an adventurer, looking for treasures.
and
Treasures differ……

Meaning in life......

"Meaning is not something we stumble across, like an answer to a riddle or the prize in a treasure hunt. Meaning is something we build into our life. We build it out of our own past, out of our affections and loyalties, out of the experience of humankind as it is passed on to us, out of our own talent and understanding, out of the things we believe in, out of the things and people we love, out of the values for which we are to sacrifice something. The ingredients are there. We are the only one who can out them together into that unique pattern that will be our life. Let it be a life that has dignity and meaning for us. If it does, then the particular balance of success or failure—as the world measures success or failure—is of less account."